The insanely boring life…

I have to confess that I do not agree with everything that Christianity preaches, but surely if you claim to be a Christian, should you act as the Bible dictates?

I know this has been covered to the point of becoming boring, but I have recently noticed oddities that I feel I need to point out.

In my school, kids walk around the school preaching the word of God to every Tom, Dick and Harry (I may be exaggerating, but that doesn’t disprove the point). Every second person will sing the Christian songs as if it is the last song they will ever sing. However (and that’s the problem)…

The next moment you hear them saying (and I quote): “I can’t believe we have that f***ing subject with that motherf***ing teacher next period. She’s such a c***. Did you do your homework?”

At which point the other would reply, “F*** no, dude. I don’t even f***ing care anymore.”

I marvel at the creative use of descriptive language and the various meanings one can apply to a single word, but let us take a moment to review the situation: A moment ago they were singing praises to their superior being (in this case, God), and God told them in many places in the Bible that you are not allowed to swear (even casually).

For instance:

Matthew 12:34-36: “O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things. But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment.”

Psalm 19:14: “Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.”

Matthew 5:37: “But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil.”

I find it hilarious that people can say they believe in what the Bible says, and yet they probably don’t even know of the existence of these lines.

And then there are people who have the audacity to say: “Oh, but sh** isn’t a swearword.”

Profanity has nothing to do with “this word is bad” and “this word is good”. It has to do with the general connotation of the word and what you are trying to say with it. Ask yourself then: How do you know that f*** is and c*** are swearwords, and yet sh** is not? If that doesn’t say anything to you, try this exercise: Since you are a Christian, you must believe in Heaven. If that is true, you will be judged by God before you may enter it. When that day comes, I dare you to stand in front of God and tell him, “I need to go sh**,” or perhaps, “you are the sh**.”

I am certain that you would not do that, and that is where your definition of what profanity is should come from. Any word that you can say without shame or fear in front of your God is pure, yet any word you would not dare say in front of Him is profanity.

Now, as I’ve said, I am not connected to any religion at the moment. I just think that if people say they believe in something, they should believe more than little bits and pieces of it (and try to convince themselves that they believe it fully).

So, next year I’ll be in my final year of high school (uni comes next!), but ever since the previous grade twelves left, the school and everyone in it started making a huge fuss about us being in matric.

Personally, I don’t see what the big deal is. Yes, it is your final year, but you know: Get over yourself. I can understand the free gift baskets, the pizzas, the casual days, the special treatment, but there is one thing I cannot stand: People that think they are better than others.

This past week should be an example for everyone. Now that we are the big guys in the school (oh whoopie), the younger kids either grovel at our majesty or try and knock us off our high-horse. Personally, I don’t blame either of those parties because, frankly, it comes from years of tradition. But is it right?

People tell me: “André! Be happy that it is your final year of school and you can order the younger kids around.”

I just think to myself: “Excuse me while I find a container for my joy…”

Regardless, I think we should reconsider all this matric-I-am-holier-than-thou-nonsense. Just because it is your final year, doesn’t make you a better person or make someone else inferioir to you.

Hollywood has finally, after years of abandoning the Broadway musical, rediscovered the medium of musical movies and, more importantly, that audiences like them.

Shows such as Hairspray,  Chicago,  Dreamgirls (and to an extent, Phantom of the Opera) have been met with critical and commercial success.  Sweeney Todd is next in line, and its limited release is in December, followed by it’s wide release in January.

Many fans have been eagerly awaiting the Sweeney Todd trailer, and when it was released a brand new interest and audience in the show has been formed. Already predicted to be a serious Oscar contender, and yet we have only seen one trailer.

But there are many other musicals that deserve a Hollywood movie version. But which ones? I have made my list of shows I would like to see made into movies:

1. Wicked.  This show has seen success everywhere it has been performed. Those who have seen it will know that it is a megamusical spectacle. In order to achieve that same effect in a movie, it will have to be a grand, big budget bonanza with a great director and a major script rewrite to accommodate the medium. I think it might work best to rework the story to bring back some of the darker themes in the book which were eliminated from the musical. The script gave the story a distinct Disney-ish feeling, which might not work that well since you won’t be able to use your megamusical-get-out-of-jail-for-free card to save the story. (Chance of becoming a movie: 8/10)

2. Jekyll and Hyde. I confess that this musical isn’t the best one out there, but it has potential. It has struggled from having bad actors play the lead role, and if it is not done right it becomes laughable. It is a volatile situation, but it can work. This movie is in the works already, but as yet no studio wants to touch it. (Chance of becoming a movie: 7/10)

3. Into the Woods. A Stephen Sondheim fairytale-musical for adults. It is a wonderful show and can work really well on screen, if done in a similar style to “The Brothers Grimm”. The show is a bit long to just transfer directly to screen, so many songs will need to be cut or shortened. If Sweeney Todd does well, I think this musical might get greenlit. (Chance of becoming a movie: 6/10)

4. Sunday in the Park with George. This is a difficult musical to do. In order to make it a movie, you will have to COMPLETELY rewrite the script. You can get away with it by keeping it in its current state, but the second act won’t work, just as it barely worked on stage. They could always just cut the second act entirely, but then you loose two of the most beautiful songs in the show: Children and Art and Move On. (Chance of becoming a movie: 5/10)

5. Avenue Q. This movie will never happen, but I have it on the list because it is a fun musical. Just imagine for a moment what this will look like? Whatever studio takes this should not expect to make any money, but should just do it for the fun. But…look at it from another point of view: This musical was spawned from a TV show, which is a film medium. (Chance of becoming a movie: 1/10)